First things first: TONY WAS APPROVED FOR RETRAINING! I know anyone who reads this is also my friend on facebook so you probably already know this, but it's such HUGE news!
The upside: Tony gets to get a new job that he's been wanting for ages. He'll be a flight engineer, which, if I understand correctly, means he'll be the #3 person after the pilot & copilot. He will do the navigation & things like that that my simple, non-mechanical mind will never understand.
The downside: He will be gone for like 6 months for school. I know this won't be the end of the world & I know that I *technically* won't be a single mom, but it will feel like it while he's gone. I'm absolutely terrified at the thought of being alone with the kids for that long, but I know we will be fine. I know that I can handle it & I know that ultimately, this will do SO much for our family.
On the same sort of token, I've taken to looking for a full time job again. Starbucks isn't giving me enough hours to justify paying for daycare, I don't make enough to cover it so it's almost pointless. It doesn't look like the recruiting gig is going to work out for the Navy, so I've been applying at some places here in town. If I'm unable to find something permanent in the next month or so, we'll be pulling the boys out of daycare & I'll be staying home with them again. While that sounds ideal, it's tough because I don't feel like the mom that was made to be home full time anymore. & along with that, Cody & Sawyer both LOVE school. They really do. They thrive there & they learn SO much more than I could teach them here. It's a double edged sword, for sure. I wish there were a way to do both. I'm sure we'll work it out in time & God will show us the right path.
This past weekend, Tony & I were able to go to the Eric Church concert. As everyone knows, I'm pretty crazytown about him. I bought the tickets when they were first available, & pretty much counted down until the day it came. My amazing friend Rebecca was willing (i.e. crazy enough) to take the boys for us from Saturday until Sunday afternoon in addition to her own three boys. We got a hotel room & made a little mini vacation out of the show. MAN, was it NEEDED. We not only had an AMAZING, ridiculously good time at the show, but it was just great to get away for a day. It was great to take a break & come back rejuvenated. The show was, hands down, the best concert I've been to. I've been to like 30 concerts in my life & it truly was the best I've seen. Not only was my man Eric phenomenal, but the other performers were great too. It was SO good.
God is moving pretty big in our lives lately. We aren't too sure how we're going to pay our bills but we are truly starting to have FAITH. Tony has started reading the bible, which amazes me & makes me crazy proud in a way I can't even explain- & it seems that he has more faith than me these days, which I love. I feel like we're both learning & making our way through & I'm starting to see how we're going to raise our boys in the church & God willing, they'll be God loving men too.
I signed up to be baptized on the 17th of June. I was baptized as a little girl but I certainly hadn't made my own decisions about God & now, it's for me. I want to really & truly KNOW God & I think I'm finally, at the very least, taking the right steps to get there. I'm proud of where we're going & where we'll get, & I know it's all because of him.
More soon. :)